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Online Self? Real-World Self? Who am I really?

Last night I edited together a bunch of snapchats I have taken into a tiktok that I decided to call my "Quarantine Diaries" -- no part of my quarantine has been particularly interesting, but placing these snaps into a single video has done a few things for me: 1. Shown my ups and downs emotionally during this time 2. really underlined the fact that this could go on for another few months... I can't help thinking back to the beginning when I thought that I would do my own 14 days and then be free.

https://vm.tiktok.com/7RsNC2/
I shared this tiktok to my instagram stories to show what quarantine has really looked like for me in the hopes that someone could relate to my emotions and feeling shared in it. 
In my response to the lecture video, I said that the online persona you craft for yourself is almost always superficial... I think that I might contradict my own theory; OOPS.

In my case I do my best to represent the good and bad sides of myself to the internet. It is not b…
Recent posts

"This is FINE"

I struggled in thinking about this weeks post mainly because my days have all been so repetitive and boring that the thought of writing anything about them sounded painful to me.

After reading some of my classmates posts, I am somewhat grateful to be bored and have uneventful days in a time like this. I have my health and my family has their health and there is not much more I could ask for. I try to remind myself of this everyday when I inevitably start to become frustrated and angry with the whole situation. I have to remind myself that, this is a fine life to be living right now given the circumstances. 

Yesterday though was the first day I felt some sliver of inspiration to have a productive full day since this all began. -- It felt like immense progress compared to the days I have been living which were full of naps, self pity, and sadness. 

I was thinking about my personal situation the other day and I was considering the fact that if this quarantine period begun when I was here in…

“Does adapting lead us to numbness?”

When I first returned home, I was in shock. Something I had dreamt about since I was a little girl had been ripped away from me. I could not believe it, but it was the truth; reality had stolen my dream. 

Since returning home I have been self isolating for a total of 34 days. My emotions for the first two weeks were quite sporadic. But when things in the U.S. started to take a turn for the worst I really felt a strong sense of panic. 

At first, the virus felt like something I had escaped, I left it behind in Europe and in my mind it would not affect my life more than it already had. Part of me viewed it as an anecdote I would tell my kids about one day... “I had escaped Italy due to a global pandemic!” I thought I would do my 14 day self quarantine and would be free to do as I pleased when that was over. But then the U.S. got hit and I realized this would be my reality for much more than just two weeks. 

I do not know if I have become numb through my adaption to this life of social dista…

Hello & Welcome to my Blog!

I am on day 26 of being inside my home & I guess you could say I am losing my mind just a little bit...